Get a Life Sports
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League Membership
The Get a Life Football League - Champions is called "the league" throughout these Rules & Regulations.

The league consists of 12 teams. Teams can use the name of a professional sports team, so long as it's only part of their team name. New York Giants is not acceptable, but Goleta Giants is. Really stupid team names are not allowed.

The league is divided into two divisions of six teams each. Divisions do not change from year to year, and division names do not change.

Anybody approved by the Commissioner can be an owner of a team. Dumbshits cannot own teams. There is no limit to the number of owners that a team can have. Unless the Commissioner is told otherwise in advance, it is assumed that any owner listed for a team is authorized to perform any functions for that team.

All franchises are parts of the league and cannot be sold. If an owner or ownership group decides they no longer want to be part of the league, that franchise reverts to the league and the Commissioner will seek new ownership.

A "calamity" is defined as death, illness, injury, relocation, or other unforeseen circumstances preventing an owner from completing the current season. In the case of a calamity the Commissioner will appoint an owner from one of the re-draft leagues to run the affected team for the remainder of the season. After the season any money due the affected team is forwarded to the owner or their family.

If an owner disappears during the season, their team may be considered an "abandoned team." The Commissioner will attempt to find new ownership for the abandoned team, or may appoint an owner from one of the re-draft leagues to act as interim owner for the remainder of the season. Any money won by an abandoned team is split equally among all remaining teams in the league. Any owner that abandons a team will be banned for life from all Get a Life Sports leagues, as it will be obvious that they are unreliable idiots.
All functions of the league are handled by the Commissioner and Deputy Commissioner in conjunction with CBS Sports, unless delegated to another individual.

The Commissioners will attempt to resolve any disputes that arise. If the dispute cannot be resolved to the satisfaction of all parties involved, the matter is put to a vote of all league owners. The result of this vote is binding.

The offices of Commissioner and Deputy Commissioner are not voted upon, but are occupied by unimpeachable tyrants. Term of office is forever, or until the Commissioners lose interest. The Deputy Commissioner assumes the duties of the Commissioner only if necessary.

In the case of a calamity involving the Commissioner, the Deputy Commissioner assumes the duties of the Commissioner for the remainder of the season.

The wisdom of the Commissioners will never be in question.
The new league year begins the day after the playoffs have concluded.

NFL Weeks 1-13 make up the GLFL regular season, with each team playing every other team once and two of the other teams in their division twice.

NFL Weeks 14 & 15 are the first two rounds of the GLFL playoffs, and NFL Week 16 is GLFL Championship game.

Offseason begins the day after the playoffs have concluded, and runs through Cut Down Day.
Fees and Prize Pool
Each team pays a $110 Franchise Fee, and $5 for each regular season loss. There are no other fees for free agent signings or trades. $100 is placed into the prize pool, and $10 is placed into the Repeat Jackpot.

Teams with a negative balance will be blocked from making waiver claims or trades.

Prizes are based on finish in the playoffs:
  • League Champion (60%)
  • 2nd Place (25%)
  • 3rd Place (15%)
Division Champions win $100 each.

All prizes based on percentage are calculated after the money for Division Champions, CBS Sports web site, and Championship shirt are subtracted from the Prize Pool. The Repeat Jackpot is not part of the Prize Pool.

The highest scoring team each week wins $20. If teams are tied for high points, the prize money is split.
Legal Roster
Offseason rosters may contain any number of players. From the day of final cuts through the end of the playoffs, teams may have a maximum of 26 active roster players.

Each team must maintain a legal roster at all times. A legal roster must have at minimum:
  • 1 Quarterback (QB)
  • 1 Kicker (K)
  • 1 Running Backs (RB)
  • 1 Wide receivers (WR)
  • 1 Tight End (TE)
  • 3 Offensive Flex Players (OFP)
  • 1 Defensive Lineman (DL)
  • 1 Linebacker (LB)
  • 1 Defensive Back (DB)
  • 1 Defensive Flex Player (DFP)
Players on the Practice Squad or IR do not count for the minimum requirements for a legal roster, and do not count against the Active Roster Limits.
Practice Squad
Each team can have up to six players on their Practice Squad. One of those spots one is limited to defensive players only, the other five spots can be occupied by any player at any position,

Players in the first two years of their NFL career are eligible to be placed on the Practice Squad.

Players can only be placed on the Practice Squad before the season begins.

Players can be activated to the 25-man roster at any time during the season.

Players can be kept on the Practice Squad indefinitely, but once activated they cannot be moved back to the Practice Squad until the following off-season (if still eligible).
The draft begins the Monday after the conclusion of the NFL Draft. The draft is eight rounds long and is conducted over several days or weeks by e-mail. Owners will have up to 6 hours to make each pick.

Any player taken in that year's NFL Draft, undrafted free agents from that year's draft class, or any unowned NFL player can be taken in any round.

Draft picks 1-6 are assigned based on worst record, if records are equal lower total points is the tiebreaker.

Draft picks 7-8 are assigned to the two teams eliminated the first week of the playoffs based on worst record, if records are equal lower total points is the tiebreaker.

The fourth place team picks 9th, the third place team picks 10th, the second place team picks 11th, and the league Champions picks 12th. This draft order remains the same for all rounds.
Final Cuts
All teams must cut down to 26 players by midnight PST on the day immediately preceding the first game of the NFL season. The 26-man limit does not include players on the IR, PUP, or Practice Squad.

After final cuts, no team can have more than four quarterbacks and no more than two kickers. These limits apply to the combined 26-man roster only. Practice Squad, IR, and PUP players do not count against these limits.
Once a team drafts a player, claims a player off of the Waiver Wire, or acquires a player by trade, that player is under contract to that team until they are released or traded away. Players can be kept by their team from season to season, there are no contracts that expire.
Starting Lineup
Weekly lineups are set at the CBS Sports web site.

If circumstances prevent an owner from setting their lineup, they can submit their lineup by e-mail to, in writing, or by phone to the Commissioner.

The starting lineup is made up of:
  • 1 Quarterback
  • 1 Kicker
  • 1 Running Backs
  • 1 Wide Receivers
  • 1 Tight End
  • 3 Offensive Flex (RB, WR, or TE)
  • 1 Defensive Lineman
  • 1 Linebacker
  • 1 Defensive Back
  • 1 Defensive Flex (DL, LB, or DB)
Points are scored as follows:
  • Touchdown run or reception (6)
  • Defensive player touchdown on a returned fumble, interception, or blocked kick or punt (6)
  • Touchdown pass (4)
  • Field goal (3)
  • Safety (2)
  • Conversion run or catch (2)
  • Conversion kick or pass (1)
  • Individual Defensive Player sack, interception, forced fumble, recovered fumble, returned conversion, or blocked kick/punt (2)
Any player may score in any fashion.

Quarterbacks are awarded one bonus point for reaching 250 combined yards (passing + rushing + receiving), and a point for every additional 50 yards.

Running backs, Wide Receivers, Tight Ends, and Flex players are awarded one bonus point for reaching 50 combined yards (passing + rushing + receiving), and a point for every additional 25 yards.

All players are awarded one bonus point for reaching 100 kickoff return yards, and a point for every additional 50 yards.

All players are awarded one bonus point for reaching 75 punt return yards, and a point for every additional 50 yards.

The official source of stats for purposes of scorekeeping is CBS Sports. If disputes occur in scoring, the Commissioner must be notified as soon as possible. The Commissioner will investigate the discrepancy and adjust the score if necessary. Any disputes regarding scoring must be resolved before the beginning of the next week's games. Scores will not be corrected after that point.

All points scored by players in the starting lineup and their performance bonus points are combined to reach a team score. The team with the higher score is declared the winner of the game.

All games can end in a tie except for games in Week 16. The tie is broken using these tiebreakers in order until one of the teams enjoys an advantage:
  1. Higher total score for active players for the regular season (13 games)
  2. Best record for the regular season (13 games)
  3. Higher total points scored in head to head games between the tied teams (including any playoff games)
If the three tiebreakers do not produce a winner, the tie stands.
Standings and Playoffs
All 13 regular season games count toward the overall standings.

The two Division Champions advance to the playoffs as the first and second seeds and receive 1st Round byes. The remaining three teams with the best record, regardless of division, advance to the playoffs as a Wildcard. And finally, the remaining team with the highest points scored, regardless of division, advances to the playoffs as a Wildcard. The Wildcard teams are seeded 3-6 based on win loss records.

In cases where teams have identical records, the following tiebreakers are used:
  1. Highest points scored by active roster during the regular season
  2. Highest points scored by active roster in games between the tied teams
  3. Highest total points scored by entire roster for the for the regular season
  4. Coin toss
Playoffs are single elimination. Starting lineups are not named for playoff games. After all games are final that week, the best possible lineup will automatically be scored for each team (Best Ball).
Waiver Wire
The league will award players using a Waiver Wire system. Any player not on the roster of another team is considered a free agent, and can be claimed at any time from the beginning of the season until the free agent deadline (the night before the first playoff game).
Players can be traded freely between teams. Trades should be made using CBS Sports, and become official when a proposed trade is accepted. Trades can also be made by notifying the Commissioner, and those trades become official when all teams involved in the trade have reported the details to the Commissioner.

All teams involved in the trade must have legal rosters when the trade is complete.

Trades can involve players, future draft picks, or both. Only draft picks for the next two seasons can be traded. So during the 2018 season, only picks for that season, 2019 and 2020 may be traded. Trades cannot involve cash, property, first born children, or any other future considerations.

During the season no trades can be made after the transaction deadline of Week 10. Trading resumes after the playoffs end.
Injured Reserve
Only players who meet the following conditions can be placed on the GLFL IR:
  1. The player has been placed on the NFL IR or PUP (Physically Unable To Perform) List.
  2. The player was on a GLFL roster when he was injured and placed on the NFL IR or PUP List.
  3. The player has been suspended by the NFL (team suspensions do not count).
Players already on the NFL IR cannot be signed and then placed on a GLFL team's IR.

Any player activated from the IR or PUP by their NFL team, or reinstated by the NFL from suspension, must be activated by their GLFL team before that player's next game, or they will be released by the Commissioner.
Wagers Between Teams
Wagers between teams are acceptable, but are outside of the league. No money from wagers will be added to or subtracted from team accounts.
Final Words of Wisdom From the Commissioner
There are no provisions for adding or changing rules based on a vote of the owners. That is because this is a dictatorship. Potential rule changes are put out for discussion among the owners and the Commissioners make the final decisions. If this pisses you off, join a different league or start your own.

Collusion between two or more owners will not be tolerated! While it is difficult to prove that owners acted in concert to affect the outcome of a game or season, any owners that exhibit behavior that strongly points to such conduct will be kicked out of all Get a Life Sports leagues for life. The object is to compete and have a good time, and the conduct described above would certainly be contrary to that goal. Besides, it would mean that said owners are assholes, and we don't want assholes in our league. Don't even think about it!